Spelling Struggles With an ADHD Child
Do you have a child that has ADHD and struggles with spelling? I have one of those, too. Did you know that is a common side effect of ADHD? I didn’t realize this until my son was in his older grades in school. It would have been so nice and saved me so many hours if I had known this when he was in elementary school.
When my son was in elementary school, he had weekly spelling tests. The teacher would send home the words for the week on Monday, and we would practice them until his test on Friday. On Monday, I would have him go over his words with me. I would make sure he could read them and then have him write them down.
For the rest of the week, I would take a practice spelling test to see which words he could spell and which words he needed to work on. He always had words that he needed to work on. I would go over the words he needed help with, and then I would have him write them down three times. I felt that as the week went on, he would or should be able to improve on the practice spelling test. This, however, did not happen.
He would either get the same words wrong every day, or he would get words that he spelled right at the beginning of the week and then start spelling them wrong. We would talk about a word over and over again. I would have him write it down so many times. He could spell a word he got wrong, but if you asked him the next day, he couldn’t remember how to spell it. I could have him write it down a hundred times (I never actually did this), and he would still get it wrong.
At that time, it was the most frustrating thing in the world. We went over it so many times. Why can you not remember how to spell it? I would get so frustrated at him. I would ask him why he couldn’t remember how to spell that word. We went over it so many times. His response always was, “I don’t know.” I sometimes would get so frustrated that I had to have my husband help him with it.
My son was my firstborn, so I was a first-time young mother. Like most parents, I wanted my child to succeed at school. We would go over the words many times, and I would try many different strategies. Some worked and some didn’t. I will share those strategies that helped a little below.
Here is what was very strange to me. I would bring it up to his teacher every year, asking what I could do to help him with his spelling. Every teacher told me not to worry about it because we have spell checkers nowadays and have him do his best. Of course, I didn’t like this response, so I would continue pushing him to improve his spelling. I thought he would improve if we just kept working on it. This, however, did not happen. He never really got any better at spelling.
I found out years later that spelling is incredibly hard for children with ADHD. When I found this out, I felt horrible. All the time, energy, and frustration were wasted on both ends. If I had known this earlier, I would not have worried about it so much. I wouldn’t have made my son practice spelling so much or had him write his words down so much.
My son is now 17 years old. He can spell better than he used to, but he still has difficulty spelling, which is okay. This is just one of the challenges he has had in his life, and he has to work with it. He is still a great student despite not being able to spell well. He is incredibly smart and has such big goals for his future. If I had known how great he would have turned out, his younger school years would have been so different.
So I hope that this article helps some of you younger mothers or fathers. If your child struggles with spelling, they can and will still be great students. Please give them a little slack on their spelling.
Here are some ideas on how to make spelling a little more interesting for them and you!
- Practice on a small whiteboard with different color markers.
- Get a small tray, put some sugar or sand in it, and have them practice spelling the words with their finger.
- Get some window markers that they can use to write on a window or a mirror.
- Bath crayons are a fun option that they can use to write on the side of the tub.
- You can use anything with letters, such as blocks or magnets.
I hope that some of these ideas help your child with their spelling.
Do any of you have a child struggling with spelling? I would love to hear from you. What ideas do you have for helping your child with spelling? Please share your ideas!
Our Son’s Challenges With Hyperfixation
One of the challenges that our son, who has inattentive ADHD, deals with is hyperfixation. In this blog post, I want to help you understand what hyperfixation is and what challenges our son and family face.
What is Hyperfixation?
Hyperfixation is best defined as an intense or prolonged interest in or an obsession with an activity, subject, or person. Simply put, a person who experiences hyperfixation has their attention completely absorbed and consumed by a particular activity or interest for an excessive or unhealthy amount of time.
There are times where see see this behavior, or intense focus or obsession with an activity in our son. Our son tends to hyperfixate on video games. He will completely immerse and lose himself in a video game for hours on end. He tends to ignore or delay everything he needs to do when he starts hyperfixating and playing video games, and sometimes it takes a major effort to break him out of that hyperfixation. He has gotten better in recent years in many respects, but he still has his moments where we see him hyperfixate.
Some common characteristics of hyperfixation that can manifest in many different situations are:
- A person will begin a task and suddenly realize many hours have passed.
- A person may ignore or not respond to others, making it extremely difficult to communicate with them and get their attention.
- A person will be unaware of what is happening around them and may tune out things like people talking, the weather, and the time.
- A person may ignore and/or delay their personal needs, such as eating or sleeping because they’re so focused on the task at hand.
- A person may find that they have a hard time stopping or switching to a different activity.
Hyperfixation can and will manifest itself differently from one person to another. Some get completely wrapped up in a hobby, while others engage in random activities like watching TV or scrolling through Pinterest.
Benefits of Hyperfixation
Wait, there are benefits and positive side effects to hyperfixation? Yes, there are many things can prove to be a benefit to those who deal with hyperfixation. These benefits of hyperfixation are only useful when focused on something productive.
1. Intense Focus
Those who have hyperfixation undergo a state of intense focus on their task or subject at hand. When this subject is positive, the attention given to it and only it can lead to doing things that no one else can do.
When our son has focus, he can accomplish anything. It is amazing to see when he gets so wrapped up in a subject what he’s able to learn and do. I’m constantly in awe about what he can accomplish when he gains focus and puts his effort into it.
2. Boundless Energy
Those who have hyperfixation tend to disregard their bodies signs for fatigue or tiredness. The don’t get bored, but rather they just keep going and going.
When our son hyperfixates he is just like this. It doesn’t matter what time it is, or how tired he may be, he just keeps going.
3. High Productivity
People who have hyperfixation can get a lot done in a little amount of time with no distractions, an intense focus, and boundless energy.
Negative Symptoms of Hyperfixation
There are also a lot of downsides and negative symptoms of hyperfixation. Some of these negative symptoms can lead to stress, grief, and problems not only for the person who is hyperfixating, but also for those who are trying to interact with them.
1. Not Listening
A common problem of hyperfixation is that a person will just not listen. Regardless of what you’re trying to say to them they end up completely ignore you. What’s really going on is that a person likely doesn’t even hear you. because they’re so focused on what they’re doing that they simply tune out everything else that’s going on around them.
2. Distracted
Even when a person is physically present, those who hyperfixate may tend to seem distracted or distant. This can easily be thought of as going through the motions but they’re in a completely different world.
3. Unable to Pay Attention
A person who hyperfixates may seem like they’re paying attention and listening to what you’re saying, but when you’re done talking to them, they don’t remember a thing you said.
4. Not Doing Chores / Essential Tasks
A person who hyperfixates will tend to put a lower priority on chores and tasks that need to be completed because it doesn’t align with their interests. This can be ignoring things like washing and folding laundry, to not wanting to bathe and shower.
5. Being Late / Making Others Wait
Because a person who hyperfixates gets so caught up in the activity their doing or focused on, when it’s time for them to stop and transition to something else, it becomes very hard to break out of the activity. People who struggle with this can say things like, “just five more minutes.”
My Son Has Inattentive ADHD
My son has Inattentive ADHD. Inattentive ADHD is a subtype of ADHD in which a person has a hard time focusing and paying attention, and doesn’t show the hyperactive behavior normal associated with ADHD. As I have come to understand my son and his diagnosis, I see that often kids with this type of ADHD are overlooked because they’re not hyperactive or causing disruptions.
One of my goals in writing this blog is to share the experience of what our family goes through with ADHD. I’ve written a lot about tactile defensiveness already, and today, I wanted to focus on ADHD. I’ll be honest, I don’t know where to begin with this topic. I feel like it is such a vast topic. I also know there are many of you that are dealing with the same challenges that I am. I don’t claim to be a professional on dealing with ADHD, but I’ve learned a lot in our challenges that I want to share. Everything I write about ADHD is from my own experiences working with my son.
Uncovering His ADHD Diagnosis
My son started showing signs that something was off in the first grade. Since he was our first child, we didn’t notice anything different. We didn’t think anything was wrong until his first grade teacher mentioned that he had a hard time following directions. We took it under advisement and continued to watch him, but we didn’t do anything that year because I still wasn’t sure if he was different from his peers.
In second grade, his teacher mentioned something about his ability to follow directions to us again, and that is when we decided that we needed to take him to the doctor to have him tested. My son was diagnosed with ADHD when he was in second grade. We had a lot of help from his teacher that year, and she was very supportive and we loved her for it!
When he’s unable to focus, you can think of it as he has a million thoughts running through his mind at once, and each one takes his mind on a different track of thought. He may be able to maintain focus for bit, but there are a lot of other thoughts competing for his attention.
After he was diagnosed, it was apparent to my husband and I that he needed a little help to be able to focus in school so we decided that we would put him on medication. You can read our experience on Should You Medicate Your Child for ADHD?
It has been a long journey over the years. We have been through a lot of challenges with him. There has also been some good times as well. Even through all the challenges I wouldn’t change it for anything.
There are so many challenges and experiences that come with an ADHD diagnosis. I am planning to break down a lot of the things I have learned along the way, and things I struggle with. To continue to read about our experiences with ADHD, please subscribe below.
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I would also love to hear from any one that is has a child that has ADHD and how you have managed it. Please, come on this journey with me!
How Am I Supposed To Get My Son Ready For College?
I went to a meeting last night that was a huge eye-opener! My son is a junior in high school. Maybe that can give you a hint. The meeting was about how to pay for college. I was screaming inside the whole time I was at this meeting.
In my mind, I was like, there is no way I have a child old enough to start looking into going to college. Where do you start? The only nice thing for us is that my son knows exactly what he wants to do. That narrows down the college choices and the applications.
I came home with two main concerns about starting the college process. First, I feel have nowhere near taught my son enough to be out there on his own. Second, how are we going to pay for this? These kept me up all night long.
Sending my child out into the real world is such a scary thought. I feel like I still have so much to teach him and such little time. He hasn’t even had his first job yet, and I have to start thinking about college. This can’t be. I know it is impossible to teach your child everything, but they still need to learn to be successful before you send them out there.
The list of things I want to teach him seems a mile long. On top of that, he is a teenager and doesn’t want to learn anything right now. So how do I teach him without him knowing I am teaching him?! I guess that is the million-dollar question. I want my children to be successful and be a good person in society. I might be more concerned about my son because he is an introvert and ikes to be at home. He doesn’t like to go out and be in the public. That issue is a whole other post. My top priority for the next two years is just teaching him life skills.
My second concern is paying for college. I haven’t been out of college for that long, but I guess it has been longer than I thought. Back in the day, I thought my college was expensive. Compared to the expense of college now, it was so cheap. When I took financial classes in high school or college, they only discussed saving for retirement. There was never any mention of saving for your children’s college education.
In this meeting, they talked a lot about scholarships. I know that is a good option, but that was so overwhelming. There are so many options out there that I don’t even know where to begin. Scholarships are great, but there is no guarantee. More likely than not, even if you get a scholarship, you will still have to pay a lot in tuition. The other question is, Do you help pay for your child’s college or make them pay for themselves?
I am sure you can tell how overwhelmed and stressed I felt after this meeting. So until I can figure it out, I advise you to start teaching life skills as soon as they are age-appropriate and save for college as soon as possible!!!
School Strategies for an ADHD-Inattentive Child
Children with ADHD struggle with attention and organization, challenging academic success. However, these children can succeed in the classroom with appropriate strategies and support from parents, educators, and the school community, as has been our experience, even though it hasn’t been easy. Here are a few strategies that help us with our ADHD-inattentive son.
Create a Structured Environment
Children with ADHD often benefit from a structured environment. Establish a consistent routine at home that includes specific times for studying, completing homework, and engaging in extracurricular activities. In the classroom, teachers can provide visual aids, such as daily schedules, to help the child anticipate tasks and transitions. Organizational tools like color-coded folders or assignment notebooks can also aid in keeping track of assignments and due dates.
Break Tasks into Manageable Chunks
Large tasks can overwhelm children with ADHD, leading to procrastination or avoidance. This is especially true with our son. If he feels a task is too large, he will delay and procrastinate completing the task. Encourage breaking down assignments into smaller, more manageable steps. This approach allows the child to focus on one task at a time, reducing anxiety and increasing productivity. Teachers can provide clear instructions and divide assignments into smaller components, providing frequent check-ins and guidance.
Utilize Multisensory Learning
Engaging multiple senses can enhance attention and retention for children with ADHD-Inattentive. Incorporate visual aids, hands-on activities, and interactive technologies in the learning process. For instance, using colored markers or highlighting important information can help improve focus. Educators can integrate multimedia resources, such as educational videos or interactive software, to make lessons more engaging and accessible.
Implement Behavior Management Strategies
Behavior management techniques can foster positive learning environments for children with ADHD. Encourage the use of reward systems, where the child earns points or privileges for completing tasks or demonstrating desired behaviors. Collaborate with teachers to establish consistent expectations and consequences, ensuring a structured approach to discipline. Praising and reinforcing the child’s efforts and progress can boost their self-esteem and motivation.
Conclusion
Supporting a child with ADHD-Inattentive in their academic journey requires a collaborative effort from parents, teachers, and the school community. By creating a structured environment, breaking tasks into manageable chunks, and implementing behavior management strategies, we can empower these children to thrive in the classroom and reach their full potential.
Remember, every child with ADHD is unique, so it’s essential to tailor interventions and strategies to their needs and strengths. With patience, understanding, and consistent support, we can positively impact their educational experience.
